Another Saturday night and I ain't got nobody-well I got somebody but he's in Iraq

And how I wish I had someone to talk to, I'm in an awful state. Well I know the words aren't exactly correct to the song but I don't know what is wrong with me today. I feel like I've been drugged or something. I have no energy, I'm weak and I just don't feel like myself.
Well, didn't really hear from hubby today. I did ge to chat with him for a few minutes online last night. I don't know I didn't see anything on the news today about Iraq for a change. There's a lot of bad weather in TN and the mid south. I am just so tired and have such low energy. We did go to church though. It's hard to believe that it's already Palm Sunday. Easter is next weekend. Easter has always been one of my favortie holidays. I love the Spring and everything is so new although living here it's the same all the time. I remember Easter of 1997 when Moira was there. My folks were up too and I was living in VA BCH. Robin from across the hall and clueless (Mike the Army recruiter) from behind her came over. It was probably one of the best Easter's of my life. 1996 was such a nightmare year for me and I finally felt like the fog was beginning to lift. Although in someways that fog never will unitl I die but I was finally beginnig to feel a bit better. That was a funny year in a lot of ways. I was sorry when Moira moved to SF. May God rest her and Mrs. DeRosa's souls. I still miss them all these years later. I often wonder what Moira would say about Michael and my kids. As tired as I am I remember that 10 years ago I was alone and was trying to meet Mr. Right and I remind myself that Moira wanted the same things too and that she never got to experience them. I am a very lucky woman.
Till tomorrow then.

Cranky kids and car shows!

Today I took the little ones to the car show. Luckily it wasn't that crowded so we got in and out pretty quickly. The kids and I all sat in a few cars (Highlander Hybrid, Trail Blazer, Explorer (2 regular and Eddie Bauer), Commander, & Lexus 400h). It was interesting though. We saw the cars we came to see though.
I told Michael that Highlander is out.
Little Bubba is bouncing up and down in his crib watching "barney". Baby Bop, BJ and those obnoxious kids are so annoying.
Well, hubby had to work on their vehicles yesterday and I guess they'll test them today. It's scary to me. I don't know what to think--I think it's getting better over there and then the news shows some bombing or something and I begin to wonder. I just wish he was home. I don't know what to think but I am worried because he said he's not getting sleep and I worry about him having an accident while driving. That's one reason we didn't look at the Hummers because he said he doesn't want to be in one when he returns. Although we did look at the H3 when it first came out because I was going to put my name on the drivers side and his on the passenger side so I would be his driver for the Officer in the family.
Well, tomorrow is Saturday and I can't believe how fast the week went with Octavia's visit. Time just flew. I hope she had a good time but I think she did. I enjoyed her visit a lot. I think the kids did as well. Small world, small Army- where Octavia works she had to set up something for a class of 06's and one of the Col's in the class was at our wedding. When she was looking at the wedding pictures she said he had been there recently. She said she will shoot him an email and tell him she was just out here and that they both were at our wedding. I know this sounds dorky but I really had a great time at our wedding. I think it was one of the best days of my life. It's hard to believe that was almost 6 years ago. Time does fly in some situations but sometimes it drags.
Well, till tomorrow then!

Second verse same as the first

Well, Octavia is gone now and the days went fast. However, the days seem to drag by normally. I don't do anything exciting I guess. I wish my husband was home but I say that a lot.
Till tomorrow then!

A year ago a little boy came for a visit!

A year ago today little JPM came for a visit. We were so excited and he was so scared. Here we are a year later and now he's our little son. We love you JPM!
Michael is on a mission and it is now light over there. I wish it was still dark. I really do miss him so and love him so much!
Till whenever then!

Of all the things I've lost, I think I miss my mind the most!

I'm beginning to worry about myself. Seriously, I really am. I can't find the remote to the tv in this room, I can't find any cough drop bags, and I can't find the source of this strange noise coming from the air conditioner in here although I believe it's probably a gecko.
I'm also having a panic attack tonight. I went to cover the grill (as I've done countless nights since January when Michael left) and lo and behold there I see a pair of sneakers on the porch. This really freaked me out so much so that I gasped when I saw them. I assume they're Michael's but I have been out there a million times and I haven't seen them before. There is a dark blue pair that I've kept out on the front of the house but I've never seen this pair of Nikes before. This is beginning to worry me. Anyway, I haven't heard from Michael and he's now 14 hours ahead of me so it's almost noon there.
I don't know what the hell is wrong with me but somethning isn't right.

This isn't Mexico.

Gee, I'm watching the news today and all these illegal immigrants are marching around our country demanding all the goodies-citizenship, welfare, medicaid, schooling (in state tutition), etc. I'm sick of these of these people demanding their rights. Sorry, they're illegal and you know what, that's great if their children are serving in our military. They should be allowed to but so what there are regular citizens who were born or naturalized here that serve too. They don't take care of my kids and I've picked strawberries, tomatoes, cabbage, lettuce, etc. I think it's disgusting that they want to Balkanize our country. When my ancestors came here they had to lose their borgue and learn English.
So, now hubby is 14 hours ahead of me. Whatever they were looking for last night they didn't find but it he called it 50% successful because they came back in one piece. I wonder what they were looking for--insurgents perhaps? I wish this year was up. It's now April 1st, and I'm hoping that the months go quickly.
I was not surprised to see Jill Carroll renouncing her statements of the previous days while in captivity. I guessed that either she was sufferring from Stockholm Syndrome or was saying what she needed to say to keep her head attached to her neck. It was pretty obvious that she didn't believe what she was saying as her eyes were cast down most of the time.
I just saw G. Gordon Liddy on television talking about the Iraq situation. He's more hopeful than ever after having been over there. I believe him and I believe that my husband is doing a true service to his country that people like the peaceniks wouldn't understand. I wish he was home but at the same time am proud of his service.

Do my eyes deceive me or is the sun out?

Wow, the sun came out about an hour ago. I can't believe it! Oh happy day!
Now I need to call the yard guy to get out here on the double to take care of these hedges and weeds.
Well, we got to talk to hubby a little bit this morning. It was great! I also got a nice card from him today. I miss him soooo much too! He said he was going to have a busy day on Saturday. I wonder what he'll be doing? I hope that he lets me know he is back and safe. He asked for one of his aloha shirts for aloha Fridays. I will get it all together for him this weekend and get it out to him on MOnday.
Well, it's been a year ago since social services called and asked if we wanted to take JPM. Of course we said yes! Now a year later he is part of our family and he is missing his Daddy so much! We love little JPM!

Skylark have you anything to say to me, can you tell me where my love where my love can be, is there a meadow in the mist?

Well, there is a lot of mist since it's done nothing but rain since about 10:00 a.m. I am sick of this rain! I'll never get this grass cut.
Well, we got to see hubby again this morning for awhile. His mustache is growing in quite a bit. He said there were mortar rounds outside the camp this morning. I remember they used to shoot in the camp while he was in Kosovo. However, I don't remember anything about mortars though. I just hope he stays safe. I'm sure that being over there is as scary for him as it is for me. I mentioned going back to the Cashtown Inn and he said he hoped we would. I worry but I know that every wife whoever loved her husband worried when she sent him off to war. I pray nightly that he will be safe. I know my parents do as well as light candles for him at church. I think my Uncle Billy does light candles too. I have candles paid up for at Andrean until June for him. I will send another check in May for the next six months.

Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil

I just finished watching "Midnight in the Garaden of Good and Evil". I didn't watch it because it's some spectacular movie or anything, I watched it to see Savannah again. That is where I first lived with Michael when we were first married. Actually we didn't live in Savannah but at Fort Stewart but we did go there quite a bit. We were so happy then-not that we're not happy now but it was a different kind of happy as we were just married-newlyweds I guess and I think that's a different type of happiness than that that develops once you've been married for a while and have had kids. I really enjoyed our time there and was sorry to leave although I wasn't sorry to leave the trailer. I sometimes wish we were back there in GA. But we can't go back to that time and if we were there things would be different. I think the crime has gotten pretty bad in Savannah since we left there. Anyway, there was still a few things we didn't get to see for one reason or another. We didn't get to Bonaventure Cemetary nor did we get to the Telfair to see the Bird Girl of Savannah sculpture. Bonaventure used to be a plantation in the late 1700 or early 1800's that burned to the ground during some party. They say as the house burned the party goers threw their crystal glasses into the fire. It's also said that you can go out there at night and hear the partygoers laughing and you can hear the sound of crystal popping in the night. People picnic out there too now.
Well, I guess it's really till tomorrow then!

Boy did I get a scare this afternoon!

I was out with JPM when I saw a car with government plates pull up beside my house. Out popped two guys in Class A's (which I know from reading the helpful Army Times that if they show up to your house in Class A's the service member is dead or very near death or if they show up in BDU's the service member is injured), walking up the sidewalk to my house. I ran to the gate and asked them if I could help them and they looked at me kind of funny and said they were there to go further down the street to see someone about joining the Army. I breathed a sigh of relief. Then they caught the blue star flag in the window and understood my concern. I hope that never happens again. I thought I was going to puke.
I have no idea where my husband is, no idea what he's really doing, no idea when he's coming home, but I do have an idea of when he's getting R & R. I guess I'm pretty lucky in that I hear from him pretty regularly. I guess somedays are just harder than others.
The rain may have finally stopped. However, it looks like more rain but I know in a few weeks that I'll be wishing we would get some rain.
Well, till tomorrow then!

Trying to get the room clean

Today JPM got a good report at the dentist. I was happy to hear that.
We were supposed to do a vtc with hubby last night but he had to do work. Now someone is very crabby so I must finish this later.

Wonder if the attack on the police/army recruitment center is where hubby is?

Well, today or late last night my time, there was an attack on an army recruiting station in Iraq. Hubby left a cryptic message and that's got me thinking. Also though there was an attack on a so-called mosque on Sunday that some claim the US was involved in and now they (Iraqis) are threatening violence against US military. Not sure but one never knows. I just pray he's safe.
Till tomorrow then!

Rain, Rain Go Away

Well, we have had another day of poring rain. I feel like I'm getting sick and am so tired. If it was just me I would have laid in bed all day. However, that isn't possible. JPM has a runny nose and MC has a slight one as well.
Heard from hubby on email today. I have no idea where he is and guess I won't until he comes home in 11 months more or less. I am glad that he likes the people he's with and all. He hasn't been too crazy about the 25th ID.
Well, not much to report today. I had a dream last night that I had another baby and it was a girl but that didn't happen on the trip to TX as my friend appeared today. Too bad in some ways. The little kiddies sure keep me busy.

Today we'll try to go to church

I got to im with hubby briefly today. He seemed in good sprirts. At an internet cafe. I have no idea where he is though in Iraq.
Boy, I'm ready to call SuperNanny on JPM. He's so spoiled or something. He screams all the time. It's almost getting worse not better. I'm thinking this is a stage. I dont' think he's a drug baby or some kids with psychotic tendencies. Easter Seals wants him to have a psych consult. I don't know. I guess I can do that.
I took them to the exchange today and I was going to get us some lunch at the food court but they were both screaming so we just came home. Now he's waking her up. Which is okay I guess because we need to get ready for church.
Till tomorrow then!

Friday and once again I can't figure out how to record Michael's show

Well it's Friday and once again the job of recording Michael's shows isn't done. I can't figure it out. I am trying but to no avail. His son is screaming because the Wiggles aren't on. I don't know how to work this stupid thing and JPM doesn't want to watch the Wiggles on the computer. NOt sure what to do.
I guess Michael is stumped as to what I did with the computer. I heard from him early this morning but none since then. I wish we could talk to him.
I am tired of the Wiggles. I really am. Barney too! I think the kids don't like Mr. Rogers anymore. He's kinda slow but I guess his message is still good. It was good enough for me but I guess they want something snazzier.
Well, in 11 months more or less Michael should be home. He will be in the middle east for a month tomorrow. I need to get going on my exercise program again. I have done nothing since we returned. In fact the treadmill has a bunch of stuff on it. I need to get my butt in gear.
Well, I am hoping to get a good nights sleep tonight. I have a jumping bean son sitting here dancing in his crib. I can tell you he's a wonderful little boy but a handful. MC had a good day I think. She's so sweet. I need to get out there and spend sometime with her. I feel like she feels a bit left out.
Till tomorrow then.

Got a wonderful letter from hubby today

Today I received a letter from hubby that he mailed before he left from TX. He said he didn't call because it was almost midnight. He wrote it a month ago. I guess they decided to send it a month later. It was nice but sad at the same time. It was basically for the kids. I hope he misses me as much as I miss him. I hope that Michael knows how much I love him and miss him. I will be forever greateful for the slow computer and the glitch at match.com.
It's been rainy again all day and last night. I had a hard time sleeping because the thunder kept going off. Well, I guess I need to stop. I somehow messed up the computer royally today and I have to get the wireless redone at some point but I spent an hour on the phone with verizon tody. Don't know what I did but the trouble started when I shut down the computer last night because of the lightning. For some reason I have to keep flipping the switch on the box where the plugs are a number of times before it goes on. I screwed it up by not having the other strip on (thinking I had) and don't know what I did. Poor Michael, he is married to a computer loon.
Till tomorrow then!

Finally W is speaking out!

It's about time that the President is speaking out about Iraq. He should have done this months ago. All the national press is negative, the wacko hollyweird and anti-war kooks get all the coverage. That Helen Thomas showed what an ass she really is. Why doesn't she retire, she's near death anyway (well she looks like it-boy am I mean). She thinks he's the worst President, Carter was the absolute worst President ever. He was/is a fool. I have no respect for him. So, I hope he keeps it up. I am sick and tired of the negative press all the time. NBC is the worst! That David Gregory makes his disdain for the President obvious and is a poor reporter at best.
I am proud that W is our President and he needs to keep up the good work.
Picture from somewhere in my files that someone sent me a long time ago.

I know Michael wants that Highlander but I want the TrailBlazer

Today when I was up on post I saw a Highlander and TrailBlazer parked side by side. The TB is bigger than the H. What does this have to do with the deployment you ask? Well, when we leave here it is sianorya to the Altima. I had a quick, nice visit with the Col/'s wife. She is nice but is moving back to the mainland this summer for her son's school. Which I can certainly understand. I won't know anyone then. Well, I did get to talk to and see hubby today. He is having fun doing his job which I think is great. I worry but that's normal. I worry about him driving that Kunia road at night so is it that much different, yes and no.
Till later than!

Tomorrow it will be a month since we last saw Michael

Well, tomorrow it will be a month since we saw Michael. I know he will be fine but we miss him so. His little boy still misses Daddy terribly. Today the candy he sent for my birthday came. I also got a postcard too! It was a great day! Not much more to say except the cops are at the suspected drug house for the second time in a week. Glad it's for sale. Wondering what goes on there. Oh well, till tomorrow then!

I wish that Cindy Sheehan and her merry band of peaceniks would shut up.

So the darling of the media, celebs and anti-war crowd will have a movie with that bitch sarandon playing that bitch sheehan. Sheehan (while in HI) came dangerously close to calling the members of the US Army "terrorists". That would include her precious Casey. Funny though, her other children don't seem to be following her lead. While I am sorry for her loss there are 2300 + other parents out there as well. She stayed in first class accomodations at the Princeville Resort courtesy of Ben Cohen (former of Ben and Jerrys). I really despise these people. They're so annoying. If hollywood depended on me to keep them going they'd be broke!