If I could go back 13 years what would I do differently?

I don't know, and that's the honest truth and that's what bothers me most. I do hope I would change what I did. Heck, I if I could go back to May 10, 1996, I would have stayed at home. Then I would have known. I hate this day. I wish I could forgive myself but I cannot. Everytime I look at my daughter I relive this. I doubt I will ever get over t his. My life irrecovibly changed 13 years ago today. My heart has been broken and someone else was killed. God, please help me to forgive myself.